Men must talk

This mostly applies to men but also to some level within women. Now with the second pregnancy we heard a lot about how easy things will be. That it will be in and out. But it wasn’t so. It was quite a long wait. I’m writing thins as we are in the labor ward. By now all the cases we heard were about how easy sends child delivery was and mentally we had that picture in mind. But the reality here is much different. While discussing with the midwife here we get to know that that’s not always the case. There are many problems and issues even for the second one. It’s never about in and out.

So why is it that we never talk about did. Does our brains just skip over all the difficult parts after birth?

Now coming to men, we rarely talk openly about our experiences with the complete process. It’s a very brushed over topic. Each exchange lasts couple of sentences just translating to things went fine in the end, rarely discussing the challenges that were faced. This, I think makes it very difficult to anticipate and mentally prepare for what is to come. This is further accelerated by that face that it is only in recent times men are involved in the whole process and in many societies this type of talk is shushed and not openly discussed. Furthermore, it is just 1-3 times in life one goes through such an experience so any experience is rarely shared and used in a collective mind.

Reading articles online is nolonger helpful. I did derive some benefit from articles during the first pregnancy but during the second one I felt the articles to be filled with medical jargon possibly AI generated, and impersonal.